In the beginning...

In the beginning it all seemed so easy. We would get married, wait a few years, and then have a baby. Simple plan, yes? So, when the time came for a baby, we thought that it would just be a matter of time until we got that prized + on the pregnancy test. It wasn't that simple...

After going off birth control, I started charting right away to see if I ovulated and if so, when. I do ovulate, but it is very late in my cycle and I spot from the time I ovulate until 8 days later when I get my period. It's something called a luteal phase defect. Something that is apparently fixable, although I haven't had it happen yet after 2 rounds of clomid.

Then we found out that my husband had low testosterone....really low testosterone. He went to a urologist who put him on testopel, a testosterone replacement therapy. He assured us that it wouldn't impact hubby's fertility. His count before starting the treatment: 40 million. His count after 3 months on the treatment: a big fat, painful zero.

I will never forget my husband's face when he was told...it was such a pained, terrified, tortured look. One of disappointment, anger, and hopelessness. He couldn't speak. His eyes teared up. He was taken off the testopel and came back 3 months later to see if his body had started making sperm again...it had not.

Our next stop was an endocrinologist (Dr. S) who is a lovely lady who has restored hope and confidence in us. She told us of a special endocrinologist in Philly who would be able to restore my hubby's fertility with some specialized shots. Something that she couldn't do herself because it needs more monitoring. So, she faxed his records over to the doctor, gave a call that hubby needs to be seen by this doctor...and we're still waiting to even get an appointment...3 months later. In the meantime, hubby is on a low dose of testosterone in order to prevent osteoporosis...but also prevents us from moving forward with ttc.

While we are waiting we have begun acupuncture. I'll talk about it more in my next post. It's a really weird sensation, but totally relaxing.

So, that's where we are starting...we're in limbo waiting to get into the specialist. We're still not sure if we will ever have biological children...we're still waiting and hoping that parenthood doesn't pass us by.