Just when you think you know you're cycle...

Waiting, waiting,
it seems so useless,
I know it's wrong
to keep on...

I've been having a ton of spotting this cycle. And while it is discouraging, it's not that unusual. I have had some pretty bad cycles before. Wednesday I thought that my period started...I had some very light red spotting that was borderline light flow. But, since then, the red bleeding has gone away (except when I poop)...as has most of the spotting. Now, I only occasionally get some brown spotting. So was that red bleeding my period (boo!)? Am I actually just having a longer LP for some reason (yippee!)? I still feel like AF might start at any minute. And my boobs...man they hurt. I believe we have hit an all time record with a new size as well. I mean, they always, get tender and grow, but this is definitely one of the worse months for it. I have also been super gassy. Once again, not unusual...I get bloated/gassy and have boob pain/swelling EVERY month.

I took a pregnancy test today for the hell of it today (11dpo if that wasn't my period.) I know our chances are pretty much zero, but I have had one in my closet for over a year now...I have to use it or it will expire soon. It was negative, just as I thought it would be. I know that I shouldn't have any hope for a BFP this month for a LOT of reasons, but I can't help but have a little glimmer of hope this month. I'm trying not to let it get the better of me.

Now that I have written this, the cursed witch will probably show up this afternoon. (Sigh) I wish I knew what the hell was going on with my cycle. It drives me crazy!